Sunday, 5 July 2009

Arse, class or just a black art - the snotter's lament

Right, topsail up! It's going to be tight - you've gotta get it right first time! Cruncher overhauled? Ok. Downfucker off? Ok. Alex, on the timmenoggy, Keep 'er snug. Mel on the sheet - keep 'er snug. Sam on the halyard, Leila tailing? - Right - go! Get er up! Bloody get 'er up Go! Go! Ok - cruncher on get 'er in! Go on - sweat it - get 'er in!. Take a turn on the timmenoggy and sweat the bugger. Right, make fast Sheet in hard. Get the downfucker on!  Right - bear away and we're sailing! Barber hauler on! Trim!

OK - get this bit of rotting vegetation to the finishing line as fast as it will go! Bloody concentrate you buggers! Eyes in the boat....